Monday, September 29, 2008
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Sep. 29th, 2008 | 03:06 pm
I've lost 7.5 pounds this week! Woo-haw, but it's the first week afterall. Next week, I fully expect the scale to budge not more than a pound, if any, just like good-ol' Biggest Loser (no pun intended). But hey! It's a good start.
I've quit WeighWatchers and joined "Spark People", a free website where one can track their nutritional and exercise choices, join online clubs, gain points for prizes, and other confusing things. I'm there, only, to track my caloric daily totals, and no more. And since it's free, it seems the best choice, even though one has to put up with annoying dancing sidebars and flickering boxes all about. The internet is so stupid and annoying, at times. Even now, here to the right of this text input box where I"m typing, I can discern movement coming from several advertisements - disabling "flash" does no good.
What were my triumphs this week? I can't think of any specifically, though I can tell you about a decided non-triumph - I ate a large frosted pumpkin cookie. It was following a tour of a workplace facility. I was hungry, I was tired, I was anxious to get back to my desk. I was suddenly faced with a large frosted sugar-cookie (my favorite), and couldn't say no. I was terribly unhappy with myself. Must have more discipline, next time.
And then, same day (no food ingested, however), I come to find that a beloved co-worker has just been given the news that the jig is up. She's going to die. In the hospital one day with a mostly benign ailment, and the next, given word that what they'd though was an ulcer, was actually terminal cancer. You can just imagine. I heard this news just before I was to leave late Friday afternoon. I had stopped by a co-worker's office to find the entire department jammed in 'round his desk. They all stared at me blankly, like I'd interupted a private meeting. I was just about to skulk off when one of them filled me in. "Oh", I gasped, with what I hoped was an appropriate solemnity, shocked, concerned expression, "How awful." I then realized that I was munching on my carrot sticks (an after work, on the way home snack), and felt extremely self-concious and inappropriate. Everyone starred at me. I think they were waiting to see what I was going to do, not knowing what they should do. "I'm going now", I said. And slunk out of the office.
Today, knowing that the word would be generally distributed to the rest of the department, I just couldn't face going in to work, all that hand-wringing and speculation and "oh dearing" and shocked silence punctuated by muffled sobbing. It's not that I don't feel just awful about it, but that I'm embarrassed to face all this in the work place with people I don't know at all well and about a person I know very little - we would pass each other in the hallways, attend the same meeting, from time to time.
Let's brighten things up a bit, shall we? Here's something I want. But will it make me look enourmous, given that I'm not very little? Be sure to look at the back view, as well as the Model shot. Largest size is a 12. I should look fairly decent in it in another 12.5 pounds. Alas, payday, and my obligations. We'll see.
What did I eat today:
1 small turkey sandwich (fat free American single, Brummel & Brown, mustard, 2 oz virtually fat-free turkey meat, 2 smallish slices of sourdough bread.)
1 cup of old Trader Joe's high fiber cereal, no milk, no nothing, just a bowl, a spoon, and the stale cereal.
1 small bowl of home-made minestrone (left over meatloaf, barley, kidney beans, cabbage, onion, carrot, sundry italiany spices)
And for dinner:
1/2 small watermelon
1/2 green pepper
1/2 red pepper
Another small bowl of the kitchen sink minestrone
Not bad, eh?
We got a yackage. I hope it's the Medifast!